The Definition of Evil
by Smile Guy
Summary: The greatest evil Rayman will ever face is rising and in turn rising every evil that ever existed. To stop these terrible times Rayman must discover the Definition of Evil. Almost impossible. This time round, Rayman's got a whole team around him...
1. Prologue: The Definition of Evil

Well, I'm back. With a new story which I'm hoping will kick ass. Enjoy!!!!!!!!

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**Prologue - The Definition of Evil**

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Evil. Funny word really. From the Old English word 'yfel', which (not entirely accurate is pronounced) yevel. So you can blame the English for all evil in the world. Or you can blame ourselves. Very noble. Very noble indeed. Evil is also a funny word because of it's definition. Evil could be considered a quality. A power. A cause of harm. Or teacher. I'm not getting to my point very clearly am I.

Basically, the word evil can be an adjective, a noun and a verb all at the same time. Clever, don't you think? But that's the exact problem. Evil is too clever. There is always pure evil. But there is never pure good to balance it up. See thy problem?

Thus, evil can never truly be defeated, evil will always reign in some form or another. So evil can always prevail and quite possibly conquer. But good can never conquer evil. Or can it? Consequently, this story is all about the balance of good and evil. It is set in a world so vast and imaginative that you could almost believe someone had imagined it all up. (Impossible! I here you claim!) This story is about what could happen if the boundaries of good and evil merged. And what the terrifying consequences would be. Be afraid, reader, be very afraid...

In a place where evil lurks, something stirred. It wasn't so large that it could tear you up or so small it could give you a nasty dose of influenza, it was just normal. If pure evil can be classified as normal. As it awoke it sent shudders of pain to all other evils in the world. It's first thoughts were: 'What has stirred me from my timeless speech?' Followed by: 'I'm hungry...' Followed by: 'There's a zombie chicken.' It's thoughts were then concentrated on eating.

It's pain shuddered through all the evils in all the worlds. Awaking ancient evils and creating new ones too. The pain turned into the forms of nightmares, wars and dirty bombs. It began to submerge the barriers of good. Not good news then. Every evil force powered on that one evil force. Every evil force joined that evil. That is, except one evil. And that evil was not even aware of it's evil.

For a split second Rayman saw the evil that was not aware of it's evil. Then he awoke and forgot. 'What a strange dream!' he thought and curled under his duvet and back to sleep...


	2. Sunrise in Ubix

Wellity, wellity, wellity. I'm onto the next chappy already. Enjoy... Or else. And please review!

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Chapter 1 - Sunrise in Ubix

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Mornings in the Ubix Valley are meant to be the most beautiful mornings in the world. Not only do they show the most fantastic sunrises, the many coloured leaves of the Pixele Tree reflect the most amazing array of colours into the sky. So many colours are shown in the sky each morning in the Ubix Valley, in fact, that no matter how many times you saw it, you would always see a new colour never ever before seen in the history of beast-kind. All this, makes the Ubix Valley the most popular tourist destination in the world, and also would suffer the most if ever evil settled there.

Another notable feature of the Ubix Valley is the fact that it is host to the great Fairy Council, the Kingdom of the Teensies and the newly set-up Beasties Palace. More on that place later. But possibly the most prominent feature of the Ubix Valley is it home to the lovable, limbless, three times saviour of the world, hero, Rayman. You knew he'd come there sooner or later, didn't you.

Now, on one particular morning in the Ubix Valley Rayman awoke. And that's when this story officially starts!!!

Green, blue, red, white, purple, googleren, choc choc and yellow sun light streamed through the leafy shade and delicately touched Rayman's eyes. Unlike normal sunlight, it didn't pierce painfully with a red light through your eyelids it just gently reminded you that it was the start of another beautiful morning and that it shouldn't be wasted. Just pure bliss. Rayman smiled, dreamily. He had had a nightmare, but it felt so distant so unimportant that it didn't matter any more. Nothing mattered when this bliss was around.

I'm not going to waste time describing what Rayman looks like. Everybody knows (or everybody who is everybody knows) the limbless body, with yellow shoes with white souls and a purple torso with a twisted ring in the centre and the flowing red cape that very few people remember that he has and the pure strong white hands which can be so gentle (to good guys) and so painful (for bad guys) and his pink head, with his giant nose and connecting eyes and his orange hair which sprouted off into two pieces on either side of his head... Damn it. I didn't mean to do that.

Here he was, all on his own. Bliss. Bliss. Bliss. "You know what," said Rayman, thinking out loud, "I think I'll have a shower..." And off he merrily skipped to the nearest waterfall. This particular waterfall was Rayman's favourite. It's waters were heated by the sun and a hot spring so it gushed down perfect water. Just right. Slipping off his red cape, Rayman stepped into the waterfall. "ARGH!"

"ARGH!" A strange female being was relaxing in the water.

"Who the hell are you?"

"Me, oh I'm Drealy..." she said, as Rayman slipped his red cape back on. "What are you?"

"A Trapnor. One of the last of my kinds."

"A Trapnor?"

"Great name, isn't it." Drealy said sarcastically. Rayman had to admit, he had never before heard of a Trapnor. Whatever. This particular Trapnor looks exactly like a 'what we would think of' as a human. In less you removed the clothes of course. Let's not go into that detail.

After a bit more acquaintance, Rayman felt that Drealy was fast-becoming a friend. She had a tone of amusement in her which Rayman liked. "I haven't seen you around before, have I? You new? A tourist," asked(s) Rayman.

"Well, I'm new. But I should be around here for a while..."

"What you doing here?"

"Taking time out, I suppose. It's tough living in the Plains of Asasara."

"I see."

"My top priorities I want to visit, are the Fairy Council and the discuss the ongoing Teensies Dispute!" The Teensies Dispute had been going on for more than a millennia. They just couldn't decide who was there true king. And who was? Who knows? "Wait a minute... I haven't asked you this," in quested Drealy, "Who are you?"

"I'm Rayman."

"Not, not, not the Rayman!"

"Well, I think I'm the only one. In less that damn internet has copyrighted again."

"The what, now?

"Nothing."

"But hang on. If you're the Rayman then you must have saved the world three times!"  
  
"Yep, that's me..." That's me, replied Rayman, his cockiness level rising a few levels. Drealy look at him, as if stunned. "Could you take me to the Fairy Council and the Teensies Chambers?"

"I guess..."

"GREAT! Could we go now?"

"I don't see why not..."

So off they went. And what else can I say? Well, perhaps, I should just let a little bit of the suspense slip. Something watched them as they had that conversation. And it wasn't exactly a particularly good something. Something, catastrophic was going to happen soon. Something. Something. Something...


	3. Globox's Morning

Well, it's now my third entry. The story will start kicking off soon. Just introducing my new characters and so an so forth. Ciao!

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Chapter 2 - Globox's Morning

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Globox blinked. Or at least tried to blink, as the moment he closed his eyes, he couldn't open them again. Damn those eyes. Those damn stupid eyes... Yeah eyes... What was he talking about again? Oh yeah eyes. Ahh, the quality of eyes. You can have evil eyes, red eyes, gentle eyes, crying eyes. You can tell what a person feels by their ey - "Get up you great pillock!"

"But, Uglette!"

"You've got to feed 100 of our 200 children."

"That's not fair!"

"Oh no. Don't worry, I'm going to feed the other 100."

"No. Me having to feed them at all."

"Come again?"

"What--"

"Mmm, eyes..."

"What? Oh just get up!" Globox sighed, and pulled himself out of bed. Ahh, well. People had suffered worse than him. But maybe he could get out of this one... But how? Hell, he needed a miracle. Thinking about it, why did he keep thinking words like hell and damn? There's no point praying for a miracle when your swearing. He sighed again. I need a miracle.

"AAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" That's strange. Thought Globox. Must be one of his kids... SMASH! Through the window plummeted an over-large squirrel. The squirrel crashed into Globox and sent them both tumbling out of the parallel window. "Globox!" screamed Uglette, "How do you manage it?"

"With difficulty!" screeched an equally perplexed Globox. Thudding onto the ground the squirrel and Globox made a sort of tumbling boulder while gathering dirt and leaves. "Ou." said Globox. "Ou. Ou. Ou."

"Err, this may not be the time," said the overlarged squirrel, "But, err, nice to meet you. I'm Chippy, you - ?"

"Globox, pleasure to meet yo -" They crashed into a ramp-shaped rock and threw up into the air. "Could be worse," said Chippy, "We could be going over a canyon." It took, between them, about ten seconds to realise they were. "AAAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"

Globox saw his life flash before him. He needed a miracle to get away from feeding his kids but did it have to go to the extremity of dying? He'd never see his kids again. Or Uglette. OR UGLETTE! Oh, the terrible shame. He would never see her agai -

SPLASH! As if by a miracle (two miracles in one day, that's unlikely) they had managed to fall in a tiny pond. "Phew," said Chippy, "That was close. You know for a second there, I thought we were gonna be pancakes!"

"But now you're gonna be kebab meat," replied a rather nasty looking crocodile.

"AAARRRGGGHHH!!!" screaming, both Chippy and Globox scrambled out of the water. Before tumbling down an embankment and crashing into none other than a Rayman and a strange human-like being.

"Hi," smiled Globox, "What a pleasant surprise."

"Extremely pleasant," said Rayman, brushing himself down.

"So now that we're all acquainted..."

"We are not acquainted!"

"Oh yeah. Rayman meet Chippy."

"Globox meet Drealy."

"Drealy meet Chippy."

"Globox meet Rayman."

"There."

"So what you guys doing?"

"Going to the Fairy Council..."

"Oooh, can me and Chippy come?" Rayman sighed and heftily raised his eyebrows. "Ok." So off they went into the distance with the sunrise finishing. And that's how the story begins.


	4. A Not So Warm Welcome

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Well, here's another instalment. Would of updated earlier but had flu. Hate winter. Don't you? Enjoy! And read & review. Ciao!

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Chapter 3 - A Not So Warm Welcome

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_Razorbeard, the second evil to try and take over the world, stared coldly at a shivering creature with a huge nose. "So," he (or it) said coldly, "What is this information?"_

"I'm not saying anything!"

"Okay," said Razorbeard, his eyes narrowing. He would have to try a different tact. "You've told me there is a new evil. The biggest threat ever... Bigger than me... What is it?!"

"I honestly don't know!"

"TELL ME!"

"I don't KNOW!" wept the big-nosed creature.

"Who else knows?"

"No one. I was the only one to survive!"

"Survive? What do you mean, survive?" The screams lasted for over an hour. Meanwhile, a shadow overlooked at the scene. 'Just as I planned,' thought the shadow and disappeared off into the darkness.

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On a much brighter note, Globox, Rayman, Chippy and Drealy happily walked along the woodland path. Globox was contemplating the meaning of life: (food or sleep?), Chippy was carefully avoiding anything that would make him do a clumsy thing (failing miserably), Drealy was anticipating greatly the arrival at the Fairy Council and Rayman was trying to summon the courage to put his arm around Drealy.

They reached a cross-sign. Ahead of them was the Beastie's Palace, to the left of them was the Pixele Tree and to the right of them was the Fairy Council and the Teensies Chamber. "We go right, yeah?" asked Drealy.

"Yeah," whimpered Rayman, his courage completely evaporating.

"Food, definitely food," said Globox randomly.

"Right, it is, then," someone said as Chippy fell down an embankment. "I'm okay!" he cried up, literally crying.

The sun was now getting quite high in the sky and noon was almost upon them. "How long," groaned Globox and Chippy in unison.

"About a mile, more."

"Cool!" smiled Drealy. Rayman laughed pathetically. They continued.

"Are we nearly there yet?" said Globox.

"No." said Rayman.

"Are we nearly there yet?" said Chippy.

"No." said Rayman.

"Are we nearly there yet?" said Globox.

"Just shut up."

"Ok. Are we nearly there yet?"

"AARRGGHH!!"

Drealy laughed. Rayman laughed pathetically. They continued. After about five minutes, they passed an acorn tree. "NUTS!" shouted Chippy and ran forward, falling over acorns.

"It's tiring, but do you have to swear?"

"Good one!" laughed Drealy.

"Good what?"

"Doesn't matter..."

"No, it does!"

"How far anyway?" inquired Drealy.

"We've got to find an acorn tree. It's the secret entr - Oh right." Rayman, Drealy and Globox ran after Chippy. Rayman, cleared away some acorns, revealing a strange symbol. He spoke some strange words and the symbol shone bright red. A silver tube rose up from the ground, rather like a periscope. "Time for Tubby Bye-Bye. Time for Tubby Bye-Bye."

"Lieutenant Minimus! How dare you!" came another voice, somewhat more aggressive.

"Sorry, m'am. It's just, you've got to admit, the silver tube does look like -"

"Oh, just shut up! Who is it?"

"Rayman."

"Access denied."

"What?"

"I said, access denied. Now poodlewoop off."

"But I'm Rayman. I've saved the world, three times."

"Access denied. Goodbye."

The silver tube slid into the ground. "I don't believe it!" said Rayman. "After all I've done for them." Drealy frowned, and sat next to him. "I'm sure there's an explanation...!"

"At least we haven't been attacked by anything." Growling filled the air. "Hounds have been released. I hope you have enjoyed your stay. Goodbye."

"I thought you had studied Sod's Law."

"Oh yeah."

"Err, guys?"

"What?"

Chippy screamed: "RRRRRRRUUUUUUUNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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TO BE CONTINUED!

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Yep, I've started them inevitable TO BE CONTINUED!


	5. Of Sod's Law and Coincidences

Well, this is more of a fun, action chapter. Though characters are introduced. Also, the character Murfy. I've completely forgotten about it. I'm gonna have to slip him in there somewhere. I've got just the chapter to do it. Keep your eyes, here. Not literally, I mean keep checking... Sigh... First however, a quick disclaimer.

**Disclaimer** - I don't own Rayman merchandise or anything like that. I do own however the plot of this storyline (apologies if it copies anyone elses, it is not intentional and would be Sod's Law) and the characters Chippy, Drealy and the main evil guy. Please note: There will be more of my own personal creations. Thank you. Now enjoy the story!

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Chapter 4 - Of Sod's Law and Coincidence

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THE CLIFF HANGER FROM LAST CHAPTER!

Who is it?"

"Rayman."

"Access denied."

"What?"

"I said, access denied. Now poodlewoop off."

"But I'm Rayman. I've saved the world, three times."

"Access denied. Goodbye."

The silver tube slid into the ground. "I don't believe it!" said Rayman. "After all I've done for them." Drealy frowned, and sat next to him. "I'm sure there's an explanation...!"

"At least we haven't been attacked by anything." Growling filled the air and the intercom sounded again: "Hounds have been released. I hope you have enjoyed your stay. Goodbye."

A huge hound about the size of a huge hound burst out of the ground. "Why aren't we running!?" shouted Chippy.

"Because we scared stiff!" said Rayman as a second hound burst out of the ground. Globox was paralysed with fear and couldn't move. "Just RUN!" Rayman, Chippy and Drealy began there run, but Globox was still paralyzed with fear. "GLOBOX! COME ON!" Globox still couldn't move. One of the hounds lowered it's head menacingly at Globox, preparing to pounce. It jumped. Rayman jumped. Chippy jumped. Globox came to his senses. "ARGH!" He ducked. "Globox no -" screamed Rayman as he clumped into Chippy's head. As the two of them fell back, the hound just missed and fell directly in the middle of them. Chippy scrambled up but stood on the hound's paw and it yelped and fell down an embankment. "Now can we run?" screamed Drealy.

"Let's go!"

The four of them burst onto the path as the second hound leapt towards them. They ran along the road and the hound started to catch them up. "HOLEY MOLEY!!!"

"Just keep running!"

"Hey, Rays?" inquired Globox, "Why don't you use your fists?"

"Oh yeah, didn't think of that one. Not as dumb as you look, eh!"

"Indeed, mwa ha ha ha - ARGH!" The hound leapt at them. Rayman chucked his fists at just the right moment. The hound scampered backwards. "That's right big guy, you've got it coming!"

"I'm so sorry!" said the hound.

"Huh?" said Rayman.

"I'm forced to do it and we're tortured terribly and oh -" cried the hound.

"Gee, I've never looked at it like that before. I guess," Rayman lowered his head, "I -"

"Let you're guard down, sucker!" and the hound struck Rayman down. Everybody gasped in absolute horror. "You little, evil bastruciclier. You tricked me!"

"Hey, we not called snarling, evil hounds for nothing you know."

"DDDIIIEEE!!!" Rayman, powerfully body-slammed the hound and they both went tumbling down a steep wooded drop. "Oh dear god!" shouted Drealy.

"Don't worry. It can't get worse!" smiled Globox.

"For God's sake, read Sod's Law!"

"I don't have to!"

"Yes you do!"

"I don't have to!"

"Yes you do!"

"I don't have to!" As they argued, a dark, hound-shaped figure appeared behind them. "I don't have to!"

"Yes you do!"

"I don't have to!" The hound pounced. "AAARRRGGGHHH!!!" They too were knocked down the drop. "This is going to hurt!" shouted a deranged Chippy.

Meanwhile Rayman wasn't exactly having the best of times. "Get off me you beast!"

"No you get off me!"

"DIE!" The pair tumbled down the side. Rayman looked up. That's strange the slope just seemed to end. It was ending because the slope was becoming a cliff. "Holy cr --" THUD! Rayman and the hound slammed straight into a wide tree. "Ou."

"OOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Globox, Chippy, Drealy and the other hound crashed on top of them. "Well, glad that's over," said Globox.

"You never learn, do you Globox," moaned Drealy, as the tree started crashing down.

"JUMP!" screamed Rayman and they all leapt out of the way. Before, I continue, let me just explain to you about rockslides. Rockslides are extremely dangerous avalanches which can be caused by the tiniest tremors. So a big tree could cause an absolutely mass - Oooh, run out of time.

SSSSSMMMMMAAAAASSSSSSSHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A great rumbling filled the air. "Oh! I'm so hungry!" groaned Globox, clutching his stomach.

"I don't think that's your stomach, Globox." A second rumbling filled the air. "Oh my god! It was! How loud is your stomach?"

"EVERYBODY JUMP!" Everybody jumped and a cascade of rocks and debris flung through the air. Rayman felt himself flung forward and off the edge of the drop. Then there was falling. Rayman braced himself, preparing for the end. He felt cold. So this was what death felt like. He felt wet. Funny feeling actually. He felt a strong current. Oh right, he had landed in a river. He felt a pair of strong hands lift him out of the water. He fell back choking. "Are you alright?"

"I think - COUGH - think so..."

"Are you sure?" It was Drealy's face, peering over him.

"You look pretty!"

"What?!"

"Err, um. Pretty, pretty green."

"Oh, right. For a second - GRR!!" It was Rayman's turn to say 'what?'. "I didn't growl, Rayman." Rayman looked up. Him, Drealy, Globox and Chippy. They were all, alright... But they weren't going to be. Hundreds upon thousands of hounds were surrounding them, each and every one of them snarling, menacingly. "Aww, man," groaned Chippy, "These sorts of things seem to happen to me every day..."

"You really are clumsy!" exclaimed Drealy.

"Uh-huh!"

"Guys, concentrate on matter at hand, please..." A particular large, more snarling hound step forward. "You have violated the code of the 'new' Fairy Council."

"New?" thought Rayman.

"We hereby sentence you to -"

"Cut the crud. It's eating-time."

"Lunch."

"Really, I'd say elevenses."

"Eat."

"Eat!"

"Eat!!!"

"EAT!!!"

"EEEEEEAAAAAAAATTTTTTT!!!!!!!!" Rayman frantically looked round for a means of escape. He couldn't see anything. "What we gonna do?"

"I don't know..."

"Aiiiiiiiiiiyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeoooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"What the hell was that?" A small grey figure came plunging out of nowhere on a vine. "Grab on!" the small grey figure who had just come plunging out of nowhere on a vine screamed. They had no choice. They clung on. "Times like these when you just want to --"

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Exactly."

"Uh-oh," said the small grey figure who had just come plunging out of nowhere on a vine.

"What?"

"The vine's breaking."

"I am suddenly unable to scream." The vine snapped. They plummeted. It just so happened that they plummeted straight into a tiny hole in the ground. "Hi, I'm the Grand Minimus!" said the small grey fig - the Grand Minimus.

"You're the Grand Minimus?"

"One of, yes!"

"Of course..."

"It's quite a coincidence actually."

"What?"

"Well, all this, really does prove the Sod's Third Law."

"What's that?" asked Globox.

"Sod's Third Law is that --" A pile of dust, dirt and bricks fell on top of the Grand Minimus. "And that certainly proves the fourth law."

"You can never say any of the laws... Wait a minute. I just managed to disprove my own theory. Aww, man. Sod's La --!"

"WHO GOES THERE!?" A fairy's voice filled the air. "WHY ARE YOU INTRUDING ON THE FAIRY COUNCIL? WHY IF ALL ARE HOUNDS WEREN'T SORTING OUT ALL THE OTHER INTRUDERS YOU'D BE IN SERIOUS -- Rayman! It's you!"

"Ly?"

"Yes. Listen, Rayman. Something seriously wrong is going on. I'm so glad you came. I need to explain everything."

TO BE CONTINUED!

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Well not so much of a cliffhanger, this time round but leaves you wanting more, I reckon! Ciao! Oh and by the way. PLEASE! PLEASE PLEASE! CAN YOU REVIEW MORE! It's getting lonely not getting any credit for my work.


	6. Ly's Concern

This chapter is short but sweet. The story begins to thicken from here on. Oh, and by the way. Just one more brand new main character to introduce.

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Chapter 5 - Ly's Concern

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THE CLIFF HANGER FROM LAST CHAPTER!

"Rayman! It's you!"

"Ly?"

"Yes. Listen, Rayman. Something seriously wrong is going on. I'm so glad you came. I need to explain everything."

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Ly led the five of them through a dimly lit tunnel. "What's going on?" whispered Rayman.

"Later. They might hear us here." They hit a dead end. "Nice going..."

"Shut up! This is the way." Ly pressed her hand against the wall. It lit up and bathed them all in a red light. Slowly, magically, the wall simply faded away. "Quickly, through!" she hissed. They all walked through. When Rayman looked behind again, it was just a wall again. "Onto this machine!"

"What is it?"

"It's a transporter. We're gonna go to my room." They all stepped on it. Instantly it exploded. Rayman felt like they were being split into hundreds of thousand of little pieces and shoved along a thin tunnel. To Globox it felt like when you had just eaten ice cream. He liked it.

Suddenly, Rayman face felt like it would explode. He was yanked forward and chucked around. He felt like he was being distorted. Which in many ways, he already was. Then it was over. "Sorry about that, Leader must of felt something going wrong. Never mind. She can't come here." Ly's voice was hushed and worried. Just like it had been when Razorbeard's army had attacked. Rayman shook himself. That was all past now. Nothing had ever been breached so terribly. Had it?

"Rayman? Rayman? Are you okay?"

"What, oh yeah, I'm fine."

"Listen Rayman. I have some bad - or good - no bad - no good - well medium news to tell you."

"What?"

"The Fairy Council has been taken over."

"WHAT!"

"No, no, no. It's not like that or anything. It's just... We've got a new leader. Drasealy." Drealy suddenly looked up, shocked. "Drasealy? But, but - that's my sister!"

"Well, your sister isn't very popular... -?" Ly signalled for a name.

"Drealy."

"Drealy."

"How come?"

"She's brought in the strictest regime."

"Such as?"

"Only fairies can enter the Fairy Council."

"What about good old Minimus here? He was in there." The Grand Minimus (now to be known as Minimus) blushed: "I was a prisoner, a captor."

"What! What has the Grand Minimus done to us!?" exclaimed Chippy.

"That's the thing," continued Ly, "Drasealy being dreadfully unfair to everyone. She's destroyed the whole justice system. True wrong-doers are getting away with things, while petty-rebels are getting imprisoned for life-sentences!"

"This is dreadful!" gasped Rayman.

"I know. And there's nothing we can do. There's already been a rebellion and everybody who was involved is now in the prisons."

"But why is this happening?" asked Rayman. Ly shrugged: "Who knows?"

"I know someone who will," said Globox, quite suddenly.

"Who?"

"Betilla!"

"Ahh, Betilla. The Leader of the Beastie's Palace!"

"Then let's go!"

"Wait!" said Ly just suddenly, "Before you go, can I ask you to do a favour Rayman?" Rayman's eyebrows raised. "It's just I have an old friend. Who needs a helping hand..." Rayman moaned: "Why do I think I'll end up regretting this?"

TO BE CONTINUED!

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What else can I say. I just like to write a bit at the beginning and at the end! Au revoir as they say in Spanish... Or was it German? 


	7. A Vandal in our Midst

Hell, this chapter was good fun to write! Although, it seems completely not necessary, it is. Believe me, it is. I believe next chapter might be a sinister interlude. Duh, duh, duuh!

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A Vandal in our Midst

* * *

"I do not believe I'm doing this!" moaned Rayman, feeling miserable.

"You have to! She's a friend of mine!"

"But do we have to go to these extremes?"

"YES!"

Rayman had a rope tied precariously around his waist and was bracing to jump into the deep dark dank dungeons below. He had been given the challenge by Ly, to rescue a particular imp named Kaelinth. Apparently Kaelinth had been accused of vandalising the Pixele Tree. In reality, she had done nothing but touch it. Crime is tough. Punishment is tougher.

Rayman looked up. Globox, Drealy, Chippy and Minimus were peering at him through a hole. They were controlling the pulley on which Rayman was connected to. "Don't worry!" cried Drealy, "Nothing can go wrong!" Ly smiled: "All you've got to do is get lowered down, grab Kaelinth and get out!"

"Great," said Rayman, "Basically a death sentence."

"You ready?" asked Chippy.

"On the count of three."

"Wait! Not yet!"

"Three," said Globox. Rayman felt himself toppling over the edge. He screamed. The pulley system lurched. "Oh dear," said Chippy. Rayman went flying straight into the opposite wall. "NOT IN THE MOOD!" shouted Rayman, angrily.

"Sorry....... Ooh! Ouch. Sorry doubled!" Rayman had crashed into the parallel wall. Little did the group of six know, that an alarm bell had just been issued all round the Fairy Council. "Just lower me down!" shouted Rayman.

"Yes sir! Right away sir!" Rayman felt his stomach lurch. He plummeted at least sixty foot into pitch blackness. How close, he came to the ground, Rayman never knew. "Sorry!" came a faint voice. But Rayman wasn't listening. He could here another faint voice. "Hello," it called, "Who's there?"

"It's um, Rayman! Come to save you."

"_The_ Rayman?"

"The Rayman."

"But why are you saving me? I am but a humble imp!"

"Ly's persuaded me too!"

"Oh, I see... Good old Ly."

"Now can you cling onto me. We going up."

"Hang on, I just need to find you."

Meanwhile, Globox, Chippy, Minimus and Drealy were still peering over the edge. "Wonder how long he's been down there?" inquired Globox.

"Two minutes. Almost less than," answered Minimus, rolling his eyes.

"Gotcha." Suddenly, the quartet heard a clicking sound. Rather like the loading of a rifle. "Hastalavisto, non-fairies!" cried a rather menacing-looking fairy.

"Oh," said Minimus.

"My," said Globox.

"God," said Drealy.

"We are so dead," said Chippy.

"What are you doing and why are you here?" growled the fairy.

"Isn't that kind of the same question?"

"I'm the one, asking the questions here!" snapped back the fairy.

"Yes m'am. Apologies m'am."

"Now which one of you's gonna explain to me first, what's going on? Or are you all gonna be dead meat served on a carcass of fish oil. I love donuts."

"Is it out of interest, the end of your shift?"

"Very nearly. But stop de-unattracting me or you'll all die."

"Tsk, tsk. Such bad double phrasing."

"WHICH ONE OF YOU!" Unfortunately, the fairy shouting was just too much for poor Chippy to take. He yelped back and got his foot caught in the pulley. The pulley shot upwards and caused a chain reaction for Rayman to go flinging up.

"YAHHHHH!!!" screamed Rayman. Meanwhile, Chippy had got himself into a rather awkward predicament. He either allowed himself to be sucked into the pulley, let himself drop down slowly and get shot to pieces or go plummeting down to his doom. He chose to plummet.

This obviously caused Rayman to go up. Suddenly his head slammed straight into a strange rod. Light filled the area. Blinding light, so you couldn't really see anything more anyway.

Chippy let go and plummeted. Minimus, unfortunately, mistook this for an act of death and leapt forward to save him. "NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" shouted Minimus and grabbed hold of Chippy. Teensies are extremely weightless creatures. Minimus made practically no difference to Chippy's fall except of being part of it. This left Drealy and Globox to the wraths of the fairy.

Ly was equally worried. Something had gone terribly wrong and it was all her fault for making them all do this. "It's time for some action," thought Ly, out loud.

Rayman felt dizzy. Dizzier than a demented cow with both Mad Cow's Disease and the flu. After all, his head had just been through an absolutely awful ordeal. "Help!" He heard a squeal. "I'm going to fall!" Rayman looked around him. Then he saw her. A tiny imp about the size of his hand was desperately straggling on the non-existent holes in the wall. "Don't worry!" shouted Rayman, "I'll save you!"

"Please hurry!" Rayman tried to make the rope swing in her direction but he was failing miserably and besides, Chippy and Minimus' inch-by-inch descent was giving him an inch-by-inch ascent. He could hear gunshots. That could be a bonus problem. Then -

"PEOPLE! PEOPLE! PEOPLE! WHAT IS THIS FIGHTING FOR, FOR IT'S A VANDAL IN OUR MIDST!"

"Please, dear god, what now..."

Out of the blue, (or blinding white) stepped a small green bug with the biggest smile you will ever, ever see. Ly saw him and groaned. It was none other than their old friend, Murfy. I say friend, I really mean acquaintance. Murfy had recently been made a rap star and his head had bloated to the size of a large fridge. The name of this pop star... A Vandal in our Midst. He began to sing:

"Everybody knows, my simple name!

It begins with M and it's still the same!

But let me tell you, I'm a really bad guy!

For my vandalism, spreads to the sky!"

Rayman stared. Stunned. "Tell me this isn't true." Murfy flew up to Rayman's level. "What's the matter with you then, my friend!"

"I'm suspended by a rope, trying to save somebody and I think my friends have been shot."

"Whoa! I think we have one grumpy person! We all know what this guy needs!" A chorus of mini Murfys appeared: "Yeah! Woo! Yabba dabba doo!"

"He needs some vandalism!"

"I don't believe in vandalism!"

"Sure you do!" Rayman, Chippy and Minimus were roughly at the same level now. After exchanging greetings they analysed their situation. "HHHHHHHHHHHIYAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

Drealy, came tumbling down. In desperation, she clung onto both sides of rope. Then there was a scream. Ly went down as well. "Now it's up to Globox!" As if on timing, Globox came tumbling down as well. "This is now awkward."

"This is going to be hilarious!" grinned Murfy.

"Why?" asked Ly, cautiously.

"The pulley system is breaking under all your weight!"

"You're gonna pay for that, wise bug," screamed Ly, grabbing hold of Murfy.

"Wait a minute," suggested Rayman, "Isn't the pulley built on a spring mechanism?"

"Oh! This is going to hurt!" screamed Murfy, clinging onto the nearest thing he could cling onto: They seemed like a very thin, small pair of legs. Meanwhile, the fairy above, brushed her hands. "Glad that's over," she snarled happily.

CRACK.

The eight of them went flinging up into the hair and straight through the hole in which the fairy was peering over. A kafuffle of screams and yikes came over them. Then went smashing directly through the glass ceiling and up and up and up. A load of other fairies stared up in amazement. Some of them, reacted well, and started shooting. Then, they were out. Slamming through layers of soil and then.

KERLUMP.

They had crashed into a tree. A particular multi-coloured tree. The tree, toppled and fell, with great speed, straight onto the groaning Murfy. Murfy slid out and stared in amazement. "That is some vandalism!" he said.

"Huh!" gasped Rayman. For they had destroyed the Pixele Tree. Beautiful sunrises were no more in the Ubix Valley. "How dare you!" screeched the fairy.

"I am arresting you for vandalising the Pixele Tree! Anything you say now may affect your case severely!"

"Wait hang on!" said Kaelinth, "You vandalised it as well!"

"I -, I - ARGH!" And at that, the fairy ran off into the woods, never to be seen within the Ubix Valley again. Suddenly, a huge shadow loomed over them. They all looked up. It was a hovercraft with the words:

BB: BETILLA'S BEASTIES

A familiar fairy peered over the edge of the hovercraft. I believe, you all have some explaining to do. The eight of them looked at each other uneasily. There were in serious trouble.

TO BE CONTINUED!

* * *

Well, hope you enjoyed it. Please give me some reviews! I want at least fifteen by the time I get to Chapter 10. Are you up to the challenge?


	8. A Short But Sinister Interlude

A short chapter. But even so, important. I put this in last minute mainly to show the evils of the bad guy and to reveal part of his plans. Read on...

* * *

Chapter 7 - A Short but Sinister Interlude

* * *

Far, far away, The Shadow watched the Pixele Tree get destroyed. Damn those vandals! That tree had been completely necessary to his plans. He would need to activate Plan B. And Plan B wasn't exactly the exact plan he wanted. Damn those vandals. The Shadow slid away into the darkness. He needed to ponder this.

He would need to destroy the other most important thing that was in the Ubix Valley... The Heart of the World. But how? How on earth could he do this? It wasn't exactly the easiest task in the world. He needed an army but not a huge one. He didn't want to reveal his true plans. Not yet. He would need a powerful army but one that the Ubix Valley wouldn't fear that much. Wouldn't fear that much because they had been defeated before? Yes. That would be it. He looked calmly at his plans. He could go one stage better...

Years ago, Razorbeard's army had attacked and nearly destroyed the entire Rayman universe. Rayman of course had put an end to this extremely quickly and had sent them all galloping into cyberspace. But there had been a second attack. Which only one person knew about. It wasn't Rayman. It wasn't a fairy. It wasn't a Teensie. It was a monster. The guardian, the one. The Guardian of the Cave of Bad Dreams... Jano. He had imprisoned them in that cave and fed them with a Teensie once a month. It was time, to pay Jano a visit...

* * *

Jano was bored. Which isn't really an amazing thing. Jano was always bored. Being a guardian of the Cave of Bad Dreams there really wasn't that much of a life. Sitting here, doing nothing. Boring. Boring. Boring. Jano then slumped off the chair and onto the floor. Why him? He would of much preferred a more fun life. He had saved the world two times more than that horrid Rayman had but Rayman got the credit. He didn't. He had grown to hate Rayman.

A flash of lightning and a roll of thunder. Jano got up and went to the entrance of the cave. This was his boundary. He could go no further. How he wished he could experience the rain. How he would love it. And yet he never would. _"You can..."_ A faint whispering echoed around the cave. Jano jumped. Had he imagined it. Was he going crazy from his curse. _"You can escape from this cave..."_

"Who's speaking?" stuttered Jano, nervously.

"It's your worst nightmare or your favourite dream depending on what you do."

"Where are you?"

"I will free you from your prison if you do one thing for me..."

"I want to escape from here... But I can't..."

"Just give me Razorbeard's Army. That is all and I will set you free."

"I want to be free but I couldn't. It would be too dangerous."

"It will destroy Rayman."

Jano's eyes gleamed. "I hate Rayman," he said.

"All you need to do is let me pass."

"I WILL LET YOU PASS!" Then Jano felt the worst pain in the world, bursting through him. The Shadow laughed, evilly. _"In death, you are free."_ And the shadow disappeared into the depths of the cave. Jano muttered two final words before dying. "Sorry Rayman..."

* * *

Can you guess The Shadow's first part of the plan? I bet you can! Well keep reading and reviewing, please. Thank you!


	9. The Beastie's Palace

Yep, three chappies in one day. That's good. Well, anyhow, This is a short chapter but I'm setting the scene for the next couple of chappies. Enjoy!

* * *

Chapter 8 - The Beastie's Palace

* * *

The hovercraft shot through the air, faster than a speeding squirrel. (Chippy was extremely amazed). Rayman however, was sitting opposite Betilla who was eyeing him angrily. "Listen, Betilla, I know what it looked like but, you -"

"I'm not angry with you about the Pixele Tree."

"You're not?"

"Oh, know. It'll have of grown back by next week. I'm just worried."

"It's going to be grown back?"

"Oh, yes. Didn't you know?"

"I thought you were going to hang us or something!" Betilla laughed cheerfully. "Oh no! Nothing like that. But -"

"Here's the but!" Betilla laughed again. "Rayman, you must understand. Although the fairies are far more ruthless then they were before, they aren't evil. You must understand that. You shouldn't vandalise." Rayman sighed. "We didn't mean to -"

"I know you didn't but... Rayman... I sense a great threat coming."

"What!?"

"Rayman... You must see the difference between the fairies and this threat. You must learn the definition of evil."

"I know the definition of evil!"

"No you don't! That's the thing. Nobody does. Evil will always return. It will never turn because nobody knows the definition of evil!"

"So there is a definition of evil that nobody knows."

"Yes!"

"Remember that Rayman. Always remember..." Murfy casually glided in: "We're here!" Betilla looked up, surprised. She stared at Rayman with a look of sadness. Then: "Indeed, let us go in!"

Betilla, Rayman, Globox, Chippy, Drealy, Ly, Murfy, Kaelinth and Minimus stepped out of the hovercraft. What lay ahead of them was the most incredible building ever. It was vast. Spires and Corridors, Extensions and Underground Access all stuck out at odd angles. It wasn't exactly what you could call symmetrical but it had a strange quality of elegance around it and was simply beautiful. They stepped through the front gates and were hit by the babble and hussle of an extremely busy market place.

Heebie-jeebies were sleeping, Macaws were hiding, Dresinnis were selling, Drossos were stealing, Graples were charging and Teensies were being victims. It was unbelievable. Truly. "Follow me!" yelled Betilla over the noise. They all followed her. Still staring in disbelief. Then suddenly they stepped indoors.

The noise of the market was instantly replaced with a soft sound of running water. A grand, golden fountain was in the middle of the room. "Wow," said Globox, in awe.

"Come on!" ushered Betilla, "Up here!" They continued to follow her up a flight of steps and a long a corridor. Suddenly, Betilla stopped and turned round. "Brace yourselves," she said.

"What - AAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!"

The corridor suddenly became a huge slide which they tumbled down. "Pretty un-slidy for a slide - OOF!" Then it was over and they all collapsed in a heap on a floor. "Now up these steps." These steps turned out to be the steps to the top of the tallest tower. They seemed to go on forever. Rayman counted 1673 steps. "Oh, that was a long way!" grumbled Murfy. At last they came to a stop, in a circular room which appeared to be a library. Betilla turned: "This is the Beastie's Palace and this room is the Secret Library."

"How original!" said Murfy, back to his usual self, after he had regain breath.

"Shut up, Murfy!" replied Ly, simply.

"Anyhow, I have brought you here to allow for the week's time that you will be escaping the guards from the Fairy Council for." Globox shuddered, remembering the dogs.

"Now, this library has every single book in the world except three. One being, an ancient tribal book which was lost in ancient times, another being the Definition of Evil and another being Murfy's autobiography which never got published."

"Aww, man. Do they have to bring that up?"

"Do you have the internet?" asked Globox.

"The what?"

"You know, world wide web?"

"We do!" scurried some spiders and they jumped out of the window. "Weeeee!!!" Rayman stared. Drealy stared. "I think the word we looking for is... Anyhow..."

"Err, yes. Right, well... I'll leave you to it."

And at that Betilla left the room. "Wow, I've always wanted to go to the Beastie's Palace."

"Yep."

"It's amazing."

"Let's go exploring."

"Okay." And they all went in different directions.

TO BE CONTINUED!

* * *

Told you it was short. Anyway, next chappie they'll be a disclaimer and such. Happy looking forward to next chapter. Bye!


	10. The Secret Library's Secret

Well, the majority of the chapter is utterly useless. However, it does begin to develop the characters and there's an extremely important thing at the end. Other than that it's just an excuse for action and riddles. Which we all love! Yay! Read on... Oh, but first, the promised Disclaimer.

**Disclaimer:** I do not own Rayman or any of it's merchandise. I only own this story. That's all I'm going to say on the matter.

* * *

Chapter 9 - The Secret Library's Secret

* * *

Rayman sat down, in a secluded corner and thought of the events that had happened to him. Meeting Drealy. Meeting Chippy. Being shoved out of the Fairy Council. Discovering a secret entrance. Listening to Ly's concerns. Saving Kaelinth. Vandalising the Pixele Tree. Betilla picking them up. Then going to Beastie's. And now this Secret Library. What a life.

Then Rayman considered what Betilla had said. A great threat will come soon. The Definition of Evil. Then, Murfy had come in. Damn Murfy. What was Betilla going to say? He would never know. All he knew was the Definition of Evil. What help would that be. Sighing, he lay back and fell asleep.

Globox happily skipped along an isle of books. Oh, how he felt enlightened by books but that was irrelevant. Food! Then he heard growling. "Oh, my poor tummy!"

"Your tummy's gonna be even poorer once I'm through with you!"

"What the --! AAARRRGGGHHH!!!"

Globox's scream shook through the library. Rayman jumped up. "Globox?" Five minutes later, the remaining seven were in a huddle. "There's something strange going on in this library and I'm gonna find out!" exclaimed Rayman.

"Then we're all with you!" everyone else said, except a certain green bug.

"Nah, ah! No way!" said Murfy, "I've had enough problems to last me a life time today I'm just gonna wait right here."

"Okay! Let's go!" And the six of them ran off. Murfy looked out of the windows. Suckers! He thought. Probably gonna get themselves eaten or destroyed or... "What the -?" Murfy stared out onto the horizon. There was a dark mass, approaching the top of the surrounding hills of the Ubix Valley. Murfy felt shivers go down his back. What was that dark mass? Whatever it was, Murfy doubted it was a good thing...

Meanwhile, Rayman's group were scouring the library looking for clues of any kind. "It seems like Globox has disappeared without a trace!"

"It's very strange."

"Extremely."

"Kind of spooky, really."

"Yea... aaargh!" Chippy tripped over a strange lever on the ground. A bookshelf started to sink into the ground revealing a secret entrance. "Wow, Chippy!" said Kaelinth, "How do you manage it?"

"As Globox once said to Uglette, with extreme difficulty."

"Well, seems like the way... Let's go!" And Rayman led them into the entrance. As they walked into the entrance, the bookshelf slid up again.

"Greetings," rasped a sickening voice, "I hope you enjoy your stay here at the Secret Library's Secret Room."

"Who's there?" stuttered Drealy.

"Me." And a gaunt-faced zombie stepped out of the shadows. It's eyes narrowed, "I know why you are here. Your friend Globox has been taken. You will never get him back -"

"NNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

"You didn't let me finish. You will never get him back in one piece -"

"NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!"

"You didn't let me finish again. You will never get him back in one piece if you do not answer my one simple riddle."

"NNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What? I suck at riddles."

"Well, I don't," said Kaelinth, stepping forward, "Imps are well-known for solving riddles. Rayman, you've helped me before. It's time I helped you!"

"Very well," said the zombie. "I shall tell you the riddle... Behind me are three doors. One door leads to Globox, another to mortal peril and the third..." The group held there breaths. "Leads to the bathroom. Does anyone want to go because I don't want to be interrupted?"

"Um, I do," said Chippy and began to walk towards the door the zombie had gestured to.

"HOWEVER! I either always lie, or always tell the truth. How do you work out which door is the one you want to take with just one question and they have to refer to the doors?"

"Oh, dear," said Kaelinth, "This one has me stumped."

"And I'm absolutely bursting for the toilet!" shouted Chippy, leaping around.

"I've got it!" shouted Minimus.

"What?"

"The question is: Are you the lying or the truthful zombie?"

"I am the truthful zombie," said the zombie.

"But he could be lying. And besides, we're only allowed one question." Kaelinth sighed and sat down. There's got to be an answer, she thought. What could she say? What would her mother of said? What would the other one of said. The other one! "I'VE GOT IT!" she shouted excitedly. They all turned to her.

"What?"

"The question is: What would the other version of you say if I asked which door leads to Globox?" The zombie nodded.

"That is correct, no matter which version I was, I would point to the Globox door. However, as this Teensie has already asked a question, I will not permit you to pass."

Rayman's eyes narrowed, and his arms began to spin round, faster and faster. "Which door? Gaunt-face."

"Ok, it's that one." said the zombie, pointing to the middle door. They all ran forward. It was the toilet. "Oh thank god!" said Chippy and ran inside the door.

"The door to Globox."

"Fine," moaned the zombie, "That one. And he pointed to the right door, before stepping back into the shadows, mumbling unhappily.

Cautiously they opened the right door. There was Globox, right next to the 50 foot monster.

"Let me get this straight," groaned Minimus, "In the Secret Library, there's a Secret Entrance and in the Secret Entrance, there's a Secret Zombie, and the Secret Zombie tells us a Secret Riddle, and the Secret Riddle leads us to Secret 50-Foot Monster."

"Pretty much."

"Yep."

Rayman bravely put his hand to his chest. "It's time," he announced, "for me to face my first boss fight." And he ran forward, before being smashed straight back. "Phew, ee. He's tough." And he ran forward again, before being smashed straight back again. "Perhaps you need are help..."

"No, no. I'm fine." And Rayman ran forward yet again, before being smashed straight back, yet again. "Rayman," frowned Drealy.

"Well, okay. Everybody charge!"

The seven of them (for Globox had joined them again) charged themselves straight at the monster. They never made it. For out of no where, balls of fire burst down. "Duck for cover!" screamed Rayman.

"I don't see no ducks!" Rayman sighed and pulled Globox down where the rest of them were huddled. "What's going on?"

"I have a horrid feeling I recognise this sort of fire. I think it's return of the -"

"Hello, punk," snarled a robo-pirate, "I think it's about time, we took you away." The group stared. Unsure what to do. Three more robo-pirates stepped forward. "You're surrounded!"

TO BE CONTINUED!

* * *

Dun, dur, duuur! Well, I thought that was a really good cliffhanger. Next chappie will have a lot of robo-pirates in it so be warned! Also, I actually worked out that until a certain chapter which I think will be about Chapter 11 or 12, the actual proper storyline doesn't completely come into shape. There are loads of hints at this point but other than that, this is just developing the characters.

I'd just like to say. I've decided to make this an epic story which will last for ages and ages. Even though, I know what will generally happen at the end I want to spread this out big time. Ok. So you guys, have so much to look forward to. Now press that submit review button. You know you want to. :-) Ciao!


	11. Return of the Robo Pirates

Well, I've err, had a bit of a break but, finally, here's Chapter 10. I've introduced some bumbling bad guys which will keep popping up as well. Oh, and the darkness is coming... If you vote for Bush! No, just kidding. Um, the darkness is coming in the story.

* * *

Chapter 10 - Return of the Robo-Pirates

* * *

THE CLIFFHANGER FROM LAST CHAPTER!

For out of no where, balls of fire burst down. "Duck for cover!" screamed Rayman.

"I don't see no ducks!" Rayman sighed and pulled Globox down where the rest of them were huddled. "What's going on?"

"I have a horrid feeling I recognise this sort of fire. I think it's return of the -"

"Hello, punk," snarled a robo-pirate, "I think it's about time, we took you away." The group stared. Unsure what to do. Three more robo-pirates stepped forward. "You're surrounded Mr."

* * *

"Okay, now, what do we do?" whispered Ly, in Rayman's ear.

"I don't know. Just don't do anything for now." One of the robo-pirates stepped forward. "Well, well, well," he said, "If it isn't the great Rayman. Not so great now, are we? Mwa ha ha ha! What are you gonna --"

"HOW DARE YOU!"

"Sorry sir, apologies sir!"

"Stealing my lines, like that." None other than _the_ Razorbeard stepped out of the darkness. Razorbeard turned to Rayman: "Well, well, well," he said, "If it isn't the great Rayman. Not so great now, are we? Mwa ha ha ha! What are you gonna --"

Meanwhile, Ly whispered in Rayman's ear. "Use your fists..."

"Use my lisp?" Rayman misheard, "Okay..."

"YOU THERE!" shouted Razorbeard, "Why are you talking?"

"Thowwy, thir, itth jutht that I find the thituation welaxing."

"What?"

"I find the thituation welaxing." Rayman replied. Ly groaned heavily. This is not exactly what she had had in mind.

"You're confusing me!" Razorbeard said. Several other robo-pirates had already run away, in confusion. "You thee. I have a lithp. And I'm not afwaid to uthe it."

Razorbeard started laughing. "The great Rayman has a lisp and can't pronounce his r's."

"I have a lithp and I can't pwonounthe my arth."

Razorbeard thudded to the ground in laughter. "Ha! Ha! Attack them!"

"You and what army," said Kaelinth.

"The one behind me!"

"There is no army behind you." Razorbeard turned round. His army had fled. "Ahh, yes," he said.

"Now," said Rayman, "I'm gonna use my fists." It was at this precise point where outside, the main turret of the Beastie's Palace started to collapse into itself. Causing a chain reaction to wreck the palace and in turn, collapse the ceiling in which, Rayman was under. Always. Both Ly and Drealy pulled Rayman out of the wreckage then tried to tug him in the other direction. "He's mine!"

"No! He's mine!" They yanked his hands right out from Rayman's body. Before realising what they had done. Shrieking, they both let go. Rayman stood up, before being splattered in his face by his own hands. Razorbeard was groaning on the ground. "Everybody run!"

Everybody ran.

"Where do we go?"

"Outta here!"

* * *

Meanwhile, a group of robo-pirates were guarding the entrance/exit. "Aww, man... I'm bored," said Barry the Robo-Pirate.

"Me too," said Larry the Robo-Pirate.

"Why do we get this job?" moaned Parry the Robo-Pirate.

"Shut up. you don't even have a real name..."

"But the author had to --" Parry was interrupted by a screeching scream. Barry, Larry and Parry looked forward in the gloom. "What's there?"

"I don't know. Sounds scary."

"Aww, I'm bored. Me too."

"Why'd you say Me too?"

"Aww, I'm bored."

"Me too."

Suddenly, a grinning, extremely irritating bug appeared in front of Barry, Larry and Parry. "Robo-Pirates?" he screeched. "I thought Rayman and his group had just unleashed a monster..." Larry stepped forward, (being the brightest of the three (not saying much)), "You step back, bug."

"Hee hee. Back bug." Parry and Barry twirled around saying the words 'back bug'.

"Bug? Hey, that's insultingly truthful." Murfy sighed and took a fly forward. "Listen Larry. If you don't let me pass and get to wherever I want to go, then I'm gonna kick your a --

* * *

"I can't believe you said arth!" shrieked Drealy as the ran, "It was hysterical!"

"It was the only thing I could do."

"I said use your fists, not lisp. Fists. Fists!!"

"Sorry Ly." Suddenly, they heard shooting. "We've got to get to the exit!"

"What do you take us for? Murfys?!" shouted Minimus angrily. It was then that they hurtled into Murfy and in turn into Larry, Barry and Parry. They went tumbling out of the Beastie's Palace and crashed straight into a tree. Larry, Barry and Parry screeched and ran off, falling down a cliff as they ran.

"Now what?" asked Kaelinth.

"We're gonna get to the Teensie's Chambers and the Heart of the World. It'll be safe there for the time-being."

"And how are we gonna get there?" inquired Minimus hysterically. Kaelinth's eyes glistened. "I've got just the route..."

Rayman sighed. He knew he wouldn't like this.

TO BE CONTINUED!

* * *

Well, hope you enjoyed and see you soon! What else can I say. Except, soon, very soon, this story is gonna get really fun (to write at least) because, our group is gonna be travelling across not-just-the-world but other worlds as well and this time they have funky gadgets. Oh, it'll be fun. That'll be starting around Chapter 14 or 15 probably.


	12. Romantic River Underrun

Well, after an extremely long wait, is an extremely short chapter, I think. Hope you like it. But please review! I'm getting desperate. REVIEW! REVIEW! REVIEW!

* * *

Chapter 11 - Romantic River Underrun

* * *

The Ubix Valley is not exactly what you could call perfect. It's certainly had it's faults. It's main one being the illegal transport of foreigners. It had remained a huge problem what with thousands of foreigners coming and living at Ubix and to be perfectly honest, nobody knew how it was done. They do now.

Underneath Ubix, lay a network of tunnels, harvesting all things that go bump in the night. It also, has the service that transports all the immigrants:

RRU

A G, an A and a Y had long ago been added to the end of the sign. RRU stood for two things: Romantic River Underrun and Route for Rebel Underlings. It's main task was to transport all foreigners and it didn't exactly have an insurance for itself. If you die on this trip, you die. No money back. It's a dog eat dog world out there.

Naturally, that's exactly where Rayman would have to go next.

A mouse scurried along the ground. It stopped suddenly. Sensing something bad was about to happen. It shouldn't of stopped. A ton of soil fell on top of it. Followed by a Fairy, a fairy-look-alike, a Teensie, an annoying bug, a giant squirrel, a big toad, an imp then a limbless fella'. "Now where?" groaned the limbless fella'.

"I think it's this way," replied Kaelinth.

"Think. Think." grumbled Rayman under his breath. They trudged along. Ankle deep in sewage. It was so dark, you could barely see the dark and they were all having difficulty seeing.

Then there was a whizzing in the air, sounding rather like an arrow. Instinctively, Rayman, clumped to the ground, getting covered in muck. Drealy screamed. "RAYMAN! Where are you?" Rayman tried to look up but found himself unable to, sinking into the mud. A blinding light flung through the air, scorching his retinas. Then he was jerked, and a searing pain went through him. Everything went black. Even blacker than before. And that was black. Black.

"Rayman? Rayman? Are you okay?" Rayman opened his eyes. And saw seven staring faces. All of them looked worried as if they knew something bad that he didn't. "You're awake."

"Course I am, and twice as cool!"

"I'd half it actually." said Chippy unhappily. Rayman looked down and gasped. He had lost his hand. It was gone. Rayman just stared, in utter disbelief. Then he heard a familiar voice. One with a very strong German accent...

"Vell, to get ze arm back, ve need to get the arm. But in ze meantime, I say it's 'armless. Hee, hee, hee. Ho, ho, ho."

"We need to get my hand!"

"Don't vowwy, I shall give you a hand. Hee, hee, hee. Ho, ho, ho." Rayman frowned menacingly. The doctor (otherwise known as Otto) jumped. "Ok, I stop. It was just a bit of 'armless fun... WAHH... That was 'armful. Anyhow, to get your arm back ve need to flush out ze sewers."

"And how are we supposed to do that?"

"Vell, being the leader of RRU (gay), I have complete and utter control of the sewers. However, ve do need to evacuate in about 10 seconds. Otherwise, ve shall all drown."

"I'm sorry did I here 10 seconds?"

"Yes," said Otto, harmfully (-hee hee-) slowly, "It's 5 seconds now... 4... 3... 2... 1... NOW!" Nothing happened.

"Err, wise guy. Nothings happening," said Ly.

"Something must be blocking the pump. By ze extra time it is taking, I'd guess it vould be a similar size and shape to Rayman's vemaining hand." Ly rolled her eyes. "It is Rayman's -" She was cut off. By water.

Jerking through water is not the most comfortable experiences... as they all found. Polokus knows what was speeding through with them. Rushing water burst by. Rayman couldn't breathe. And he was running out of breath. How long could it last? Forever, it felt. Then it was over. Quick as a flash and Rayman felt himself slumped on a sharp wooden surface.

Looking up, he saw, he was on some sort of gondola. His main notice was pain but he also noticed a Teensie sitting next to him. And it wasn't Minimus. "Welcome to Romantic River Underrun.............. You're not the cops are you?"

"No," insisted Rayman.

"Sure?"

"Positive."

"Very well, welcome to Route for Rebel Underlings. I shall now transport you to the Heart of the World and breed and multiply happily!"

"What are you on about?"

"I don't think I have to go into the details of breeding, do I?" Then Rayman was saved by a laugh. "I'm sure Rayman is fully aware of such matters!" It was Ly. Then Kaelinth butted in.

"To the Heart of the World, Bob!"

"Aye, aye Kaelinth!" And the gondola shot forward. It was fast. Very fast. Extremely fast. Too fast. Way too fast. Etcetera. "I think I'm gonna be sick groaned Globox," he was. Over Murfy. Suddenly, it stopped and the eight of them went tumbling forward. Rayman felt like his insides were on a rollercoaster and he was on one going in the opposite direction. Blearily, he looked up. "You've got your arm back!" exclaimed Drealy.

"So I have..." smiled Rayman, before slumping to the ground.

"Hope you enjoyed your Romantic River Underrun. I hope you do it again some time --"

"Never," they all said in unison. Then the gondola swirled into the darkness. And Rayman felt like he was going up. He was. It was an elevator. Slowly, colours flew through the air and it was extremely funky. Then Rayman knew where he was. A place where he had visited every single time the world was in danger. It was the Heart of the World. Aka, Disco of the Teensies.

TO BE CONTINUED!

* * *

Oooh, hope you liked it. Funky new update system, don't you think? Anyhow, hopefully next update will be quicker. No idea what the next chapter will be called. Have an idea what's gonna happen though. Ciao! 


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